Friday, 6 December 2013

MY 50TH!




Hey there Jock Strappers!

Today is somewhat of an anniversary!

It’s my 50th blog post which also coincides with my 600th Tweet!

As I mentioned way back in June 2012 my life has gone viral!

For too long us rural dwellers survived only on hearing the word cunt being used by inept farm hands without iPlayer Radio to cancel it out

For too long we actually had to wait until Friday to wank over shiny new tractors in Farmers Weekly magazine

And for two long the farm offices wifi boost did not reach my field!

So I decided to boost that wifi and get bloggin! Too let the world know who I am and what I’m about!

Some of what I have written in past posts may sound a tad far fetched but magic mushrooms grow in my field so get the fuck over it.

Hopefully I haven’t mellowed too much as I try and fit/succumb into the conventions of the internet and social media.

And just to let you I’m staying off facebook because its shit!

You will always find me here on blogger:


On twitter:

@jockthebull

And tumblr!


Also, as we go into 2014 the good people at Wordpress will be getting a good look at my black ass too, as I have secured the domain jockthebull.com from them and will be populating that with great content too!

The main reasons for giving you worthy Jock Strappers insight into my dramatic world were that I wanted to enthuse you about agriculture and share some of my experiences with great friends who mean the world to me!

Farming is an amazing business and feeding people from the fruit of my loins makes me content in my work. I know it involves LOTS of sex, and you don’t even get into trouble for doing outside, but that’s not the main perk. Being part of rural Dorset and adding to this great place’s local economy really does make me feel warm inside.

Ok so the vets a cunt a the village vicars wife’s a whore but this area is outstanding in its beauty and the quality of its beef output.

One of my other reasons for stepping up to the Internet limelight was to promote the great taste of British Beef and above all, the beef cut from us Anguses – or Angi, if you are a Roman.

Everything is on track for me to gain momentum and extend my reach!

Cool things are going to be happening in 2014! – You will see an actual website and you will get actual monthly food and nutrition segments from my close friend Jerry The Adder (Too Hard for Hibernation) through his ‘Adder Bites’ section

Meanwhile, I am going to be posting another blog before Christmas as I have had the opportunity to catch up with some great mates of mine and was able to really get on their tits going on about their general gayness the whole time. It makes for funny reading Jock 
Strappers!

Now: Time to get serious >>>

DON’T DRINK AND DRIVE THROUGH DECEMBER

Last night I was out in the field freezing my gargantuan balls off when I saw two cars coming out of the village swerving around the road like a date rape victim on acid riding on a roller coaster.

Just don’t fucking do it. It ruins lives.

And if I see any more of it going on through the village, one of the highest performing police forces in the country will be on you!

That’s right I’ve got a direct line to Dorset police, just like they have for me. Well actually its more of a massive arc light with a silhouette of my face (with accentuated horns - standard) placed on the middle. They shine it in the sky when the gypsy cunts out run them.

                                                  Dorset Police: Won't put up with it




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