HEAT WAVE BEEF RECIPES

We appear to have a heat wave on our hands!

Sometimes we can lose all faith in our apatite during these hot times. Sometimes we resort to just eating salads as well as all sorts of other ridiculous behaviours like skipping meals and eating too much ice cream!

But in these extreme times you need as much energy as you can get Jock Strapper’s!

So why not get some of your heard over, light or fire up your barby (depending on if you have a charcoal or gas fetish) and get down to cooking some of my kids!

That’s right, I’m going to guide you through three fantastic summer steak recipes that you can sizzle up on a warm night with your nearest and dearest!

As you know I’m all about the taste and nothing else! So it goes as standard that whenever I mention the word beef in what is to follow you will be using British Aberdeen Angus !

First up – BBQ’d beef with mushroom sauce!

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Prep: 10min › Cook: 40min › Ready in: 50min

This will serve 6 and you will need 650g of sirloin

For the sauce you will need the following:

50g butter

1 shallot, finely chopped

4 Portobello mushrooms, sliced

375ml red wine

800ml beef stock

1 clove garlic, chopped

1/2 teaspoon dried thyme

1/4 teaspoon salt, or to taste

Freshly ground black pepper

2 tablespoons plain flour

·         Go for a medium heat on your BBQ

·         Melt butter in a large frying pan over medium-high heat. Gently fry the shallot, and then add mushrooms and cook, covered, for about 5 minutes. Remove mushrooms from pan and set aside. Pour 400ml of beef stock and red wine into the pan. Increase heat, and bring to the boil. Allow the mixture to boil until it has reduced by 1/3.

·         Barbecue the sirloin to your desired doneness. Remove to a plate, and set aside to rest. I don’t believe in seasoning or Jamie Oliver, so get over it > great steak taste shouldn’t need enhancing.

·         When the sauce is reduced, stir in the remaining 400ml beef stock, garlic and thyme. Return to the boil and continue to cook for another 5 to 10 minutes. The sauce will be thin. Whisk in flour, and cook until the sauce is desired thickness. Taste and adjust seasoning if necessary. Stir in the cooked mushrooms. Serve steak with mushroom sauce spooned over it.

If you want bring all the salad with this and add some garlic bread to soak up the sauce. Why not try a little steamed asparagus with it too? Eat whilst the sun disappears over yonder hill and feel safe in the knowledge that you have eaten well!

Next up is a little dish that call “Single Jock” This dish packs a true punch and is ideal for summer break ups! So get the lads round, get the BBQ going, eat this and toast the good times!

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This will serve 4 and you will need 4 200g cuts of my black ass! That’s right lads – bring on the rump steak!

Prep: 10min › Cook: 40min › Ready in: 50min

For the marinade:

160ml extra-virgin olive oil

3 tables spoons of Belvenie Double wood 12 year old single malt Scotch!

3 tablespoons soy sauce

1 tablespoon minced spring onion

1 tablespoon minced garlic

1 tablespoon ground black pepper

1 tablespoon chopped fresh parsley

1/2 teaspoon dried thyme

1/8 teaspoon crushed dried rosemary

·         Combine the olive oil, whisky, soy sauce, onion, garlic, pepper, thyme and rosemary in a large sealable plastic back; seal and shake to mix. Add the steaks to the marinade. Seal the bag, squeezing out as much as possible. Refrigerate for at least 1 hour. Then, remove steaks form the marinade. Allow the steaks to come to room temperature before cooking.

·         Fire up a medium heat barby and lightly oil the great. Cook the steaks until they are beginning to firm and are hot and slightly pink in the centre, 6 to 7 minutes per side. An instant-read thermometer inserted into the centre should read 60 degrees C. Cover the meat with two layers of aluminium foil and allow to rest in a warm area for 10 minutes before serving.

Simply garnish the dish with some rocket, cherry tomatoes, feta cheese and some Xhamster on you iPad or other mobile streaming device ;-)

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Lastly towards the end of your BBQ session you may well be approaching the pissed as a fart stage. So why not take full advantage of those burning red embers still glowing on your barby? As you know Jock Strapper’s it is fully logical to end a nights drinking with a kebab. Only during this nights drinking you have your own kebab house >  Alwright! So this is a great recipe for Middle Eastern 100 percent Scottish kebabs!

Prep:5min  ›  Cook:30min  ›  Extra time:1day marinating  ›  Ready in:1day35min

For 2 Skewars:

• 3 to 4 strands saffron
• 2 tablespoons milk
• 350g beef steak, cubed
• salt and pepper
• 1/2 onion, blitzed until mushy
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cumin

• 1/2 teaspoon Cayenne pepper
• 1 red onion, cut in half and each half cut into quarters
• 1 red pepper, cut into chunks
• 1 green pepper, cut into chunks
• olive oil

• In a small dish combine the saffron and milk. Allow to rest for a few    minutes.
• In a glass or plastic container with a lid, add the beef, saffron mixture, salt and pepper, onion paste, cumin and Cayenne. Stir well to coat the beef. Cover and marinate overnight in the fridge.
• Thread the skewers evenly with beef, red onion and peppers.
• BBQ or grill on medium to low heat for about 30 minutes or until the onions are cooked. Occasionally baste with oil.

Eat whilst intoxicated, keep your mouth closed whilst you are chewing and don’t act like a cunt with the skewers.

Happy munching Jock Strapper’s and remember: British Aberdeen Angus is the perfect accompaniment for friends, lush summer evenings and BBQ’s!

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